Going to Buy Sh*t

April 2, 2009

gardnerTake a big whiff. No that isn’t the feces pond that Artie experienced in Kandahar, in fact it is the exact opposite. Spring is in the air, and baseball is just about upon us. I have finished off three fantasy baseball drafts, and I am contemplating one more (<—Biggest Loser). Luckily for me, I will be experiencing actual baseball too. The season is starting up, and I need to buy some gear. If you aren’t from the northeast, you really don’t know about this jersey t-shirt thing. Growing up in San Diego, we never had something like this. The Padres weren’t going to spend money to license a t-shirt of Wally Joyner (damn he looks old). The fans didn’t care enough to buy it and the organization was so cheap that the players didn’t stay long enough to elicit any real fan appreciation (plus they didn’t win enough games). When getting to New York I saw these wonderful t-shirts that are like jerseys. You can buy most of the players. It is considered perfectly acceptable attire for any occasion. Not only do they have the jersey type shirts, but they also have creative ones that tend to center around sentiments of Buck Foston. Don’t worry, Sawks fans have the same shirts for Yankees to suck on.

There wasn’t one player that I really wanted drapped across my back when I jumped on the Yankee bandwagon. I liked Giambi, but I already had a BAMF Dirtbag’s jersey. Good thing too because he is long gone. I flirted with getting an A-Rod shirt because people were hating on him constantly, but then I realized that he is a Primma Donna, and now we are in the Post Madonna era I certainly can’t be supporting that behavior. Below I will drop some choice on you. I am going to run an unofficial poll to see which one I get. Here are the choices;

Joba Chamberlain-The guy is a stud. He has a sick 10.58 K/9 ratio as a starter, throws 100mph+ which makes that fire thing show up on the Fox radar gun, and he even has the power to postpone courts. If you can’t support this type of player, who can you support?

CC Sabathia-He is a big dude, costs a lot of money, and makes every fan of the Red Sox instantly hate him because he signed with the Yankees. He is a man that was well respected by the league and seen as a gamer for his efforts with perennial losers like the Indians and Brewers. Then, he was signed by the Yankees and everyone thinks his arm is going to fall off. If he was a Brewer people wouldn’t think this. Any man that gets this type of hatred is surely worth consideration.

Mark Teixeira-I didn’t care about him when he was on the Rangers, I didn’t think he was that good on the Braves, and he was not “clutch” in Anaheim (or Los Angeles or whatever). Now that he is a Yankee, he is probably the best 1b is the game, and worth every penny. I need to show my support for the team by supporting their financial decisions. Besides, how can you not like the guy that breaks the “i” before “e” rule twice in one name. That is impressive.


Brett Gardner-Granted, they don’t make it yet, but he is now the starting CF. He is the first centerfielder the Yankees have had in a while that didn’t cost a fortune or hold up trade talks for Johan Santana, so I am on board with the decision to start him. As a Yankee fan, we love our high priced free agents, but there is a certain soft spot in our heart for the home grown boys. Obviously, we love winners like Mo, Posada, and Jeter, but everyone has those shirts. We have the next coming of Shane Spencer here. The new guy that doesn’t appear to be that good, but is gonna get a lot of stuff done. I drafted him in my fantasy league, and I may need to show continued support by buying the jersey.

Now let the voting begin! I anticipating the vote will be tied at 0 for all of them, but I will check the comments to see all of the amazing comments that I am sure to get. These votes are going to sway my opinion on which jersey to wear, so take is seriously. Of course, there is the factor that I am going to new Yankee Stadium to sit in the new really ridiculously good looking suites on Saturday, so I am just going to go out now and by a Tex jersey. Thanks for the input though.


Stealing Headlines: Jay Cutler

April 2, 2009

Mile High Cutler

No one reads us, our blog has a really confusing name, we have real day jobs so we never update, and don’t have any credentials or access to anything or anyone interesting. We want to be involved in the online community, but don’t even know how to make a tweet, or know exactly what that is. We tried branching out on facebook, but they changed their format now and we don’t even know how to get to our profile. What does all of this mean? It means we have nothing going for us on this site, and we are just doing it for fun. Welcome to a new catagory called stealing headlines. If you are like us, you are busy at work, but manage to go to ESPN.com (4 or 5 hundred times a day) just to check out the recent headlines. What we are going to do is pluck one of those headlines and give our opinion about it. After all, what is a blog for?

Today’s headline; “Jay Cutler is a cry baby

First and foremost, WAAAAAAHHH!!! Our opinions don’t really center around Cutler whining about not getting enough attention, but more around the trade offers. All of the parties involved (the Broncos) seem to have seriously departed from reality. Two first rounders? Are you kidding me? That is more than the Patriots and Packers got combined for Favre and Cassell. Fine, Cutler is young, has a very good arm, and parties like an animal, and judging by our friend Craigers, Denver is a good place to party, but ain’t no one gonna give up 2 first rounders for the portly partier (233 lbs). The Broncos want two first rounders for a guy that was picked 11th in 2006. That would be some good return on that investment. People haven’t seen inflated returns like that since the introduction of mortgage backed securities (nice work on the finance joke). Once again, the fans are the ones that miss out. Cutler is talented, I would much rather have him over Jason Campbell. They had a chance to build a talented offense, but are giving up on that. As a Charger fan, he is the perfect player that you can love to hate. The bottom line is that Cutler isn’t going to move easily, and the Broncos are going to be worse off for starting this situation. No one is going to comment, or even read this, but what would you give up for him (especially if you are Jets fan)?

The Show: Post-season Award Alternative Endings (NL)

November 14, 2008

charlie-manuelBecause it’s fun to take the contrarian point of view, here are some alternate endings to the major awards that the MLB has paraded out the last couple of week. 

ROY: Sure Geovany Soto had this award locked up in May. Good thing voters ceased to observe any rookie play for the remainder of the season. Soto’s average steadily dropped for the entire summer, making a slight return in the final month of the season, due in large part to the rest between starts. So who do we think should have won? Jair Jurrjens. Jurrjens had 10 wins by the end of July. If we used the same measures that we did for Soto, his 2 month slump shouldn’t have cost him the award. He played in a division with such stalwarts as the Mets and eventual world champion Phillies. Jair finished with a 3.68 era, and that is after posting a 4+ era over the last two months. If the Braves can pull off the Peavy deal, they will be left with a starting 3 in the rotation that can match with any in the majors (Peavy, Smoltz, Jurrjens). Besides, his name is Jair. Also, pitchers are much more valuable than hitters. Just look at Cole Hamels.

Cy Young: Tim Lincecum was your winner. He didn’t lead the league in wins or ERA, which many claim to be overrated stats, but he did lead in strikeouts. WHooHoO! He also played in the paltry NL West, in which he only had to face many 1 time. Johan Santana should have been the winner. Perhaps the only reason that Omar Minaya should even be employed right now. They couldn’t have given up enough for the guy *cough* Brian Cashman *cough*. All Johan went on to do was not lose after June, and only once giving up more than 3 runs. Anyone that watched the Mets this season knew that was only about as much as he could have given up. If Johan should have one regret, it was that he ever let Jerry Manual take the ball from him. The Mets bullpen literally blew 5 wins for Johan, and the team failed to win 6 times when Johan gave up only one earned run. I think if you put 5 more wins on the plate for Johan, and even consider the effort that he gave in the last start of the season, he should have been the unanimous Cy Young award winner.

MoY: Lou Pinella managed to win with the most talented team in the NL. Good for him. Just in case he wasn’t a lock for it, the Cubbies went out to get Rich Harden. Pinella proved his managerial prowess by limiting Harden from injury for the remainder of the season. That deserves a major award, but not this one. Too bad his managing didn’t translate to the playoffs. Although these are “post” season awards, they do not factor in the “post-season.” No matter though because if they had, the rightful winner would have only excelled by even more. This award should have gone to Jerry Charlie Manuel. Yes the guy also won with talent, but at least he didn’t lose with it. *cough* Yankees *cough* Manuel managed to guide the Phillies to first in a tight NL East race again. He managed to do it without a starting rotation, sans Hamels. If that isn’t reason enough, have you seen this guy’s gut? I is amazing that he can even stand up. Although, the guy did look like a stud back in the day.

Credit where credit is due

November 14, 2008


Sure they lost. Sure they propelled the Jets to first in the division for the first time since 2001. Sure he looks like a gimmicky morning radio show host at a beauty pagent, but give the guy some credit. A man that is a career back-up has stepped into the NFL starting role on one of the best teams ever, and is performing adequetly. To say that Cassell did enough to win last night is an understatement. He was 30-51 for 400 yards, 3 TDs, no TOs, and threw a perfect game tying TD with 1 second left. Those are Graham Harrell-like numbers, who says you can’t run the spread offense in the NFL? It’s not like he doesn’t have the options. We aren’t talking about the Denver Broncos here. I know there are plenty of people out there who snuck on their fantasy football waiver wire to pick up Benjarvus Green-Ellis, and surely must have liked his 9 yards this week.

This is a team that lines up with no RBs, and it isn’t Tom Brady standing back there. You know he is going to pass, and somehow he tends to get the job done. He has one of the best deep threats in the league, and he can’t throw the deep ball, but he is hitting those underneath routes instead. Comandering a TD drive in a minute from his own 38. He is moving the chains, and can scramble on top of it. With the exception of the San Diego game, Cassell has given the Patriots a chance every game. He is by no means a replacement for Tom Brady, or for any starting QB for that matter, but I will admit he is doing a stellar job. Kudos to Bill Belichick for not rushing out to sign Daunte Cullpepper or Chris Simms. He won’t be winning the Super Bowl, dating world class super models, or winning MVP awards, but Matt Cassell is doing a fine job. Just like my fantasy football team, just make it to the playoffs, and anything can happen.

We are talking about a league where Rex Grossman took a team to the Super Bowl, anything can happen.

The best Olymiad story (that you haven’t heard)

August 26, 2008


On a side note, what is the deal with the word Olympiad? Why don’t they just call it the Olympics? Someone should tell NBC that they used the word incorrectly. Whatever you call it, this is the best story that you haven’t heard from the Olympics. Unless of course your uncle told it to you at a party this weekend, and you subsequently went on to google the story and noticed that there are many stories about the kid (including 2 identical ones in the LA Times). Regardless, I am going to tell you the tale of Olympic gold medalist Henry Cejudo…

Where it starts, in 1987 two illegal immigrants found their way to California and made a baby. One of these people decided to steal, take, and deal drugs. This landed him in prison, and ended his life before speaking with his aforementioned son over the last 15 years of his life. The other person decided to work her a$$ off and make a life for her four children. Yes, this life consisted of sleeping 4 boys to a bunk bed, but it was a life nonetheless. Nelly Rico moved her children away from her drug swindling father, from apartment to apartment, room to room, and with no money. They traversed California, New Mexico, Arizona, and Colorado Springs.

The kids hardly had a house, hardly had a bed, and hardly had food, but their mother hardly didn’t work. Any job she could get her hands on, she would do. When she was able to scrounge a little extra, Nelly gave it to those less fortunate. Economically speaking, there weren’t many, but that didn’t matter. Nelly knew how to work hard, and so did her boys.

That work ethic drove Henry into a gym to practice wrestling. The boy had no equipment, no soccer mom to take him to and from, and no snacks from the “team mom”. Henry wrestled in jeans and barefoot. Wrestling wasn’t meant for jeans, but that didn’t matter. The kid worked hard, and he was a prodigy. He liked wrestling, but hated church. That didn’t sit well with his mother. She put the fear of God in the boy’s eyes. The only thing scarier than the wrath of God is a punishment from a mother.

What the school of hard knocks taught Henry was how to fight. Three brothers didn’t hurt either, at least not psychologically. Physically it hurt like hell. Henry won 4 state titles, in two different states, and was the youngest person ever to win a national championship. The first time he ever slept in his own bed was when he got to the Olympic training compound in Colorado Springs. Now all he had to do was win gold, and that is exactly what he did.

Henry won the gold in the 55 kg weight class, we have no idea how many pounds that is (around 120). He had to cut 10 pounds the day before the competition to do it, we have no idea how many kgs that is. Henry was the 31st ranked wrestler in the world at 122 lbs. 31 is a long way from 1. He also had to come from behind every match to do it, but that is just the way Henry likes it. He was like a fish out of water in Bejing, but his cheering section made him feel at home. They were so rowdy they almost got booted by the communist dictatorship. The only thing missing was mother Nelly. She didn’t make the trip because she gets so sick during his matches, or she had passport problems, or she hates flying, either way, it doesn’t matter. She wasn’t there in person, but she was more than there in spirit. Nelly had been relegated to listening to his matches on the radio, and having one of her sons translate the action. None of that mattered as Henry. He finally found home in Bejing when he laid out on the mat exhausted, draped in his native flag, and crying after achieving everything that he has ever fought for. When informed about his $60K bonus for winning he exclaimed, “I’m Rich.”

The Olympics were great. Debating about Michael Phelps is fun , by the way he is, sure Usain Bolt is flashy and interesting, Team USA reedeming, but stories like Henry are what need to be remembered. The hard working son of illegal immigrants goes on to make Olympic history. Now that is rich.

Tuck Time: Uhoh Osi

August 25, 2008

Ahhhhhhh. Take a deep breathe. What’s that smell? Fantasy drafts are in the air, starting QBs are being named, and people are starting to talk about a little more than Favre. Football season is right around the corner. Unfortunately, when one extremely vowel laden DE turned the corner, he blew out his knee.

What does the loss of their best defender mean for The New York Football Giants? Well, it certainly isn’t good. Some might rush to judgment and call for the return of the sackmaster Strahan, but they have already played Brett Favre, so he would have one less sack to get. At his ripe gap toothed age, he needs all the sacks he can get.

There is one silver lining for Big Blue. The man that was a partial inspiration for this blog will not be leaving the field. Justin “Awesomo” Tuck will have the chance to play every down this season. For the best DE that people have only cared about because he dominated in the super bowl, it is his chance to move among elite DEs. With 10 sacks in limited action last year, the Giants will not miss a beat from the sackmaster position. It never helps to lose one of your best players, but fans should be happy that they will be priviledged to watching one of the best young players in the game. We here at Awesomotime vow to bring you every iota of Tuck related news (not really, he will just write about it when we feel like it, but at least it will be more than anyone else will be writing about him). Okay, you can exhale now.

Pros do have heart?

August 24, 2008

Manny Ramirez doesn’t hustle, Randy Moss takes plays off, I can’t remember the last time I saw someone play defense in the NBA. Apparently, Jerry Colangelo wasn’t crazy with the “3 year commitment.” He had a dream, and as most of us dreamed, his vision came to fruition. He had faith in something that many of us thought had died in the youtube era. Apparently, after years of not dominating, and not even medaling, the millionaires had enough.

Watching the Olympics is great because it lets us all watch people that are sort of amateurs do things to push themselves to an athletic pinnacle, and doing it all in the name of country and pride. For the most part, we don’t see pros, and when we have seen them, they have been typical pros, but watching the USA Basketball team romp through this tournament, I have seen more heart from a Pro since the season finale of “Pros vs. Joes.” A band of millionaires, with a millionaire coach, and billionaire owner truly did find redemption. The “Redeem Team” didn’t just redeem gold and American dominance, they redeemed a youthfulness and of joviality that can only be likened to the kids at the LLWS. Watching Carmelo Anthony and Jason Kidd jump up and down on the sideline for each play that was made by their teammates, watching Kobe run end to end nailing 4 point plays and playing defense, watching the team run around the gym and celebrating at center court rejuvenated my belief in Pros. The US victory makes me happy to be a fan, and I just hope that athletes all over the world take a que from this team. Bring the heart back to the game, it’s better for everyone. The Pros went from people that exhibit behavior that can be likened to this, to behavior like this. See what happens when they try.

livebloging-all star drinking day

July 15, 2008

Today is the birthday of one member of awesomo and we are drinking our faces off.Awesomo is also attending the all star game and since you can watch it on tv we decided to liveblog our drinking instead.The plan is to drink in the city until we stumble into the game at 8. After the game or when we leave we are going to continue the drinking in hoboken.Will this plan work? WE hope yes or we may pass out on the path train.The first stop was Stout and we had two drinks a piece.We are now at Turtle Bay and its white trash tuesdays so it looks like PBR cans and some punch. Check back later for updates. Disclaimer we may not continue the liveblog. Next place is Opal which is about two inches away from Turtle Bay. Turtle Bay had the craziest bartender but our drinks were crazy cheap. Now after taking a red devil shot we are close to wasted. Wait we are already wasted so therefore we are going to continue because we are in for the long haul.

So who got the scoop?

July 11, 2008

By now, 5:05 on the east coast, most people have probably heard that Brett Favre is looking to break away from the Pack. Possibily to move to Florida and hang out with Mary. Yes that is big news, but we leave big news to the big news sources. Is Favre going to get released? Will there be tears? Where will he land? Who knows? One thing we know is that we don’t care.

There are 3 sources that do care though; ESPN, Fox Sports, and SI. ESPN is claiming that their very own Chris Mortenson got the scoop, and it would appear as though he is reporting right from Brett’s side (byline of Hattiesburg, Miss). If he truly is all up in Favre’s grill, then why didn’t he drop the story until 4:46 pm?

When you look over at SI.com, it appears as though the AP had the story at 4:35pm. Upon even closer review, Fox Sports dropped the breaking news at 3:54. Resident headline grabber and ass kicker Jay Glazer gives credit to ESPN, but not specifically to Mort.

We find it hard to believe that Mort is actually doing any reporting. It must be nice to have the brass up at ESPN pass along scoops, and make it look like you are doing an excellent job. For now score one for the WWL, but Fox Sports had the headline first.

Boob Tube Time-Movie Edition

July 11, 2008

Not the usual boob tube update, but we are the usual blogger. It’s Friday night, and you know what that mean, right? It’s date night. We are in a movie kind of mood, and we will see if the Mrs. is too. Now comes the question, go to the movies (which is expensive and a hassle), or stay in and rent from our friendly neighborhood Blockbuster? We will hammer that decision out later, but one thing that will weigh heavily is the movie selection. These are the possible candidates for the night;


-“Hancock”-Some might argue that Will Smith is among the best actors of his generation. Some might argue that. We are not going to lie, but we weren’t impressed with the “Pursuit of Happiness” or “Ali.” His acting wasn’t bad in it, just more a product of a poor movie. Granted we are suckers for films like “Independence Day,” which we typically watch when it appears on Encore. We heard “Hancock” was alright. It doesn’t look like a movie that makes me want to jump out of my seat and go see, but it looks entertaining nonetheless. On the downside, we heard it was alarmingly short, and if we are gonna pay 40 bucks for a night out, we at least want to earn it.

-“HellBoy II”-Not gonna lie, we pretty much didn’t want to see this movie. We like comics, we like action, but the first one was just eh. We didn’t really want to see this movie…until we saw this commercial, which has nothing to do with the movie, but we are suckers for blatant jokes. The only one we like is at about 50 seconds.


-“Vantage Point”-We are a little suprised by this movie. Judging from the lack of information that we have heard about it, we are going to assume that it isn’t very good. We are thinking it is something along the lines of “The Interpreter,” but perhaps we will find out more. Besides, we are fans of most of the projects that Forest Whitaker takes on.

Of course the “Dark Knight” comes out next week, which pretty much renders all other movies obsolete.